It seems like amongst my sisters and sister friends we’ve finally got it right. We let go of all of the “moochies” and let God order our steps to be reunited with our #HIT (Husband in Training). And now the season is upon each of us, where our #HIT will become our #H2B (Husband to Be).
This means that our visions of white dresses and “I Dos,” will no longer be magazine cut outs on poster board or pins on Pinterest, but a blueprint to our day down the aisle where we finally get to kiss our groom.
What these vision boards couldn’t predict, for me, was what happens if God decides to bless you with all of the desires of your heart all at once?
Fresh off the Ferris Wheel where he proposed in October 2016, my thoughts of having a May wedding were curtailed by two developments: 1. May is “high” wedding season (budget and popularity wise) and 2. Unbeknownst to us an embryo had started to make a home in my uterus with a slated arrival for June. POOF! There went the 7 months of wedding planning.
We looked into alternatives to still have our dream New Orleans nuptials before our precious baby girl was born. Although some tears and frustration were inevitable, my husband and I were able to plan our “Gatsby Glam” W.E.D.D.I.N.G. in 100 days.
Whether you have a hundred days or a whole year, below is a wedding acronym I created to help when it’s your time to time to transition from fiancé to wife.
After making your guest list and checking it twice, consider sending some of those extra save the dates or invites to a few celebrity VIPs. Try your favorite television show host, actor or artist (some celebs have been known to autograph the RSVP card and send it back). For a sure response, send one to the President Obama and First Lady and to Mickey and Minnie (we got postcards from both).
Mickey and Minnie Mouse
The Walt Disney Company
500 South Buena Vista Street
Burbank, CA 91521
Mickey and Minnie Mouse
The Magic Kingdom
1675 N Buena Vista Drive
Lake Buena Vista, FL 32830
I cannot tell you how many times we were reminded by our already wedded friends to simply “ENJOY,” the wedding process and moment. Use the planning process to bond with your groom and create new adventures with your closest gal pals. When the day comes, try to remember to eat and be present in the moment. Something magical happens the day of your wedding, that is difficult to put into words but you and your groom will both be able to relate in the transformation that transpires once all eyes are on you and him and you finally say, “I DO!”
Can’t find exactly what you need or it won’t arrive in the time frame that you need it in? This is where DIY is your friend. . . no, like literally a friend. If you have time to channel your inner Martha Stewart, by all means go right on ahead, but remember as the bride you may already have enough items on your wedding to do list. So enlist a friend to help execute your personalized projects, or don’t forget websites like Etsy, where at your fingertips you have thousands of cyber crafty friends that are waiting to create and assemble your wedding invites, layout and print your wedding programs, and create tons of other personalized items that add a unique touch to your special day.
Delegate?!? For some of us “Type A” brides this is a foreign concept, but essential to not losing your mind before the big day. Write out your vision and make it plain, but realize that some of the execution you have to entrust in your family, friends and wedding party. Your mother-in-law is quite capable with organizing a rehearsal dinner and your bridesmaids can plan your bachelorette festivities you are sure not to forget. What can help you rest assure that the task will be completed to your liking is by limiting your bridal party to those that truly know you and have your best interest at heart. Sometimes, it doesn’t matter if you’ve known them for ages, if you know “Petty Labelle,” doesn’t mix well with others or has a finicky temperament she may be better placed in a seat in the audience and entrusted with only one specific task. . . show up and be pleasant.
We’ve heard of all-inclusive resorts for vacationing, but who knew that there are all inclusive wedding venues as well. These venues are almost as simple as <insert bride and groom here>. For a predetermined price for your specific guest number, everything from ceremony to reception is taken care of. No need to coordinate multiple vendors for table linens, centerpieces, catering and DJ, because they have it all covered. There are even some venues that include your invitations and response cards as well.
When it comes to wedding planning, some of your best resources are amongst your social circles. Whether planning to wed within your familiar city limits or beyond, ask friends and family members for their recommendation on aspects like venues, photographers and videographers, bakeries, and florists. You need not to have been to a wedding per se to know who takes the best pictures or bakes the best cake. Also, don’t be shy when visiting prospective sites like bridal salons or tailors, to ask for a copy of the latest bridal magazine especially if they have an untouched stack. For free, you’ve received an invaluable resource to vendors specific to your wedding locale.
Last, but certainly not least is: Don’t forget to collaborate with your groom. Commonly, the credit for the wedding vision and the execution is given all to the bride. Or one assumes that their groom just wants to show up and only have a say when it comes to the items being consumed on the wedding day. But ladies, many of you may be pleasantly surprised to learn that your groom not only has visions for your wedding day as well, but also has every intention to do what he can to ensure that the day goes without a hitch. Many grooms are thrilled to help choose wedding invitation designs and songs for your wedding day soundtrack. They are also quite capable of choosing their groomsmen, coordinating them to rent or purchase their suits, arranging day of transportation and hotel accommodations to name a few. Groom involvement is also essential to putting out the little fires that may arise when a guest, a wedding attendant or a family member goes awry.
Happy WEDDING Planning ladies!
Wedding Hugs and Kisses,
Dr. Essence N. Robinson